


sometimes i think all i’m ever doing is trying to convince myself i’m alive

by TomNookisaCrook



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, Logic | Logan Sanders-centric, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, cursing, mention of food, procrastination
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:14:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24675160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TomNookisaCrook/pseuds/TomNookisaCrook
Summary: The sides hadn’t seen Logan come out of his room for a while. Sometimes when Virgil was coming out of his room in the early hours of the night he would see Logan just going back into his room. Patton and Roman brushed this off as Logan’s tendency to take his time to work and plan out Thomas’ life. Virgil, however, could not simply brush this off.OrLogan won’t come out of his room and the other sides and Thomas are forced to go to Logan’s room and check on him...
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton & Thomas Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 101





	sometimes i think all i’m ever doing is trying to convince myself i’m alive

The sides hadn’t seen Logan come out of his room for a while. Sometimes when Virgil was coming out of his room in the early hours of the night he would see Logan just going back into his room. Patton and Roman brushed this off as Logan’s tendency to take his time to work and plan out Thomas’ life. Virgil, however, could not simply brush this off. Logan usually comes out into the living room and works right? He usually sits on the couch with his laptop, not in his room. _Right?_

_I mean, it’s been days and I don’t think he’s just gonna walk out or anything. He’s probably busy and doesn’t wanna be bothered. But no one has seen him in_ days _I mean shouldn’t we check on him?_

“Hey, guys?” Virgil nervously approached Roman and Patton who were sitting on the couch and watching cartoons together.

“What’s up, kidd- umm I mean, Virgil?” Patton corrected himself, looking up at Virgil.

“Well, Logan hasn’t come out of his room in a while and I know you guys said ‘It’s nothing to worry about’,” Virgil said, doing air quotes, “-but I’m literally Thomas’ anxiety and I just wanna make sure he’s alright and what if he-”

“Virgil,” Patton stood up and grabbed both of Virgil’s hands in his, “It’s alright. If you’re still worried about Logan then maaaybe you should just go check up on him.” Patton comforted Virgil

“Oh! And perhaps should give him some of these brownies that Me and Padre made.” Roman said, summoning the plate of brownies from the kitchen. The rainbow plate was covered in chocolate brownies topped with star and heart sprinkles.

“That’s a great idea Roman!” Patton responded, clasping his hands together.

“ Oh um… alright.” Virgil said, grabbing the plate from Roman with both hands. “Thanks. I’m gonna,” Virgil pointed to the stairs,” head out. Soooo bye.” Virgil stumbled away. He nervously rubbed a hand through his hair and took a deep breath.

It was clear that Logan was in his room and not somewhere else in the mindscape, this was indicated by the fact that all of Logan’s room lights were off and his computer screen’s light was filling the room. Virgil peeked under the door, making sure that Logan was, indeed, still there. Hesitantly Virgil knocked on the door. A couple seconds passed, or minutes, or maybe even a few lifetimes, Virgil couldn’t really tell.

“Logan? I um- It’s me!” Virgil said, quickly realizing his mistake. “Oh my gosh, we all have the same fucking voice. I’m sorry I should have clarified, it’s Virgil. I just wanna… talk to you.” He stumbled to correct himself. It was a few moments before he realizes that Logan probably won’t come to the door. “It’s ok if you don’t want to, I can leave. I have some brownies that Roman and Patton made sooooo… I’ll just leave them here I guess, if you wanna get them later. Sorry for disrupting your work.”, Virgil gently set down the brownies in front of Logan’s door. He decided to just head back to his room, not wanting to upset the others with his failed attempt.

Virgil flopped down onto his bed and lay in his room, going to bed in the early hours of the morning. The next day when he goes out into the hallway he can see the plate of brownies is gone.

  
  


—————————————-

Soon enough it was time for another one of Thomas’ conversations with the sides about his problems. This time it was Thomas’ attention and his procrastination on his work.

“I just feel like I’m not really getting anything done… I just keep putting stuff off.” Thomas explains to the sides.

“Well that’s odd. Logan has been working away in his room for days, maybe he just hasn’t finished yet, and that’s why you feel like you’re not working?” Roman ponders, setting his chin in his hand.

“That sounds pretty explanatory to me! Maybe Logan is just working up some big idea and he just isn’t finished with it yet. If it’s taking so long it must be really great!” Patton exclaims.

“I-I don’t know guys… I mean he’s been in his room for a while. Maybe we should just make sure he’s ok.” Virgil suggested, pulling at the strings of his hoodie.

“Well why don’t we just summon him? I guess he would be mad to be taken from his work but the need can bear it.” Roman dramatically waved his hand down and up to summon the logical side for which he failed. He attempted again, failing to summon him. “Ugh, why isn’t he coming out.” Roman pouted, crossing his arms.

“Why don’t I try, kiddo.” Patton said, waving Roman off. He softly brings both his hands up. Again Logan doesn’t rise up as expected. “Well, shoot… he must be glued to his work!” Patton shrugs.

“Shouldn’t we check on him? Like Virgil said. I just wanna make sure everything’s ok. I mean he couldn’t have ducked out! I’m still… logical.” Thomas said, interjecting into the group. “We could just go to his room?” Thomas shrugged.

Patton shivered.

“I do love Logan, he is a part of our famILY but his room is so _cold_.”

“Yeah, I agree with Dad. Me and Logan are very… different. Being in each other’s rooms isn’t super fun.” Roman said, holding up his pointer finger.

“C’mon guys! We need to make sure Logan is okay! Please? I think he might need us.” Thomas said, clasping his hands together and giving puppy eyes. Roman rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

“Fine. We can go into Logan’s room.” Roman pouted.

“Hmmmmm-Alright I’m in!” Patton bursts out.

“Okay. Thomas? You’ll need to do what you did to get into my room. Think of the logical side of your mind. Think of your memories, your knowledge.” Virgil said while Thomas closed his eyes and started to think. Slowly each side started to sink out into Logan’s room.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please feel free to comment and give me feedback!
> 
> These characters belong to Thomas Sanders and the crew on Sanders Sides
> 
> (I’m not giving up on my other fic i swear, just wanted to write something else)


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